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Posts Tagged ‘neighbors’

One of the joys of running is that you get to see a lot of interesting things.

Take the neighborhood I run through each day.

There is a home owner who has taken it upon him or herself to establish parking codes for the development.

NoParking

I’m not sure this is legal, or even enforceable.  I’m sure there must be some story behind this (the guy I run with says it involves a neighbor who was having some work done on his home and construction vehicles being parked in front of this particular house.)  Regardless, the sign screams to me:  THANK GOD YOU DON’T LIVE HERE!  Seriously, who would want to deal with this every day?!

But I never saw anyone park there.

Until today.

truck

I don’t even know where to begin.

The white tarp that looks like a bedsheet?

My truck isn’t parking . . .  it’s just sleeping!

Maybe they won’t see it if I cover it up.

You’re going to need a bigger tarp, Chief Brody!

Pay no attention to that truck behind the curtain!

I’m not a bad truck . . . just a very poor wizard.

Waving hand . . . This is NOT the truck you’re looking for.

But it gave me a smile on my run today.

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I got a notice in the mail from my electric company.

Apparently, my family uses “too much” electricity, at least compared to my neighbors.  I’m not sure why this concerns the electric company, since I do pay them for it.

ElectricReport

Seriously, can you imagine McDonald’s accusing you of eating too many burgers?  Papa John’s declining to bring you a pizza because you order more than your neighbors.  Barnes & Noble refusing to sell you a book because you bought too many?

And just who are these energy efficient neighbors?  I mean, I don’t consider myself to be a waster of electricity, although my computer is on right now.  My house doesn’t look like a runway at night, visible from 12,000 feet.  Do these people live in caves?  Do they never recharge their phones?  No TV?  Granted, we have a pool, which probably accounts for the peak in the summer months, but across the board, we use 71% MORE ELECTRICITY than our neighbors.

I’m shocked.  Maybe I shouldn’t have done that wiring job by myself!

outletplugs

Do you see a problem here?

 

So I clicked on the Who are my neighbors? link on the web page shown above.  I expected to see mug shots of these “green” people with their solar panels and candles.  Instead, I got this informative report:

Neighbors

I really don’t think there are 100 homes within 0.8 miles of my house.  And how do they know how many occupants reside in these bastions of energy efficiency?  Does the NSA provide them with data?

And then I noticed where they offer a “full list of energy saving products and services for purchase.”

Now I’m not so shocked.  McDonald’s doesn’t want me to stop eating burgers, they want to sell me a diet plan!

Yeah, I’m not sold on that either.

Maybe I’ll just run an extension cord from my neighbor’s house over to mine.

That should do the trick!

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